Dad...

I wonder what the feeling must have been like when the first time you held me in your arms..When I was born in this world..a part of you..I wish I had a time turner. Human feelings are so difficult  to decipher..From the time I have gained my consciousness ,how can I forget how you used to wake up at 4 am so that you could wake me up , dress me up, make my hair, how you smiled at me when I got onto the school-bus, how you used to cover my notebooks in brown paper with so much love and write my name on it(you have the best handwriting in the world), even after returning from office  so tired how you worked hard with me so that I can finish my H.W. (I loved solving maths because my dad knew every answer). I still remember you saying that algebra  was your favourite  topic ,

How can I ever forget my first cycle, the one you bought for my 8th birthday..I was so excited and i hugged you so tight .. then when I was in 10th when you taught me how to drive..You were so happy..and now you don’t let me take the car on my own because you fear something terrible would happen..Still you got me a license as you know I do drive it sometimes..How can I forget how much you panic everytime you see me in pain ,how you would  rush to make things right when you see tears rolling down my eyes, how you even stop Maa when she scolds me (even now...), how can I forget how happy you are when you see my results..doesn’t matter how good or bad they are, you are always proud  over me :) how can I forget how you used to hide gifts and chocolates in my socks every midnight on Christmas eve (you are my true Santa)! how will I ever forget you singing  the 'happy birthday' song, the 1st thing when I woke up every 27th of June (with surprise gifts in your hand), how annoyed you used to get whenever you saw me in front of mirror , and how  happy and proud you were to see me give various stage performances...

Now that I am living so far from you, you never give me a single chance  to ask you for something, whatever is needed is always there...still how can I ever tell you how much I  miss you..now when no one is there...

To wake me up..

To tell me to have my meals..

To take me out in the evening...

To bring my favourite   snacks in the mid of the night..

To sing and dance for cheering my forever changing mood...

To tell me to study..

To tell me to sleep..

To tell me not to strain my eyes sitting in front of computer screen..

To tell me not to cry..... 

I  am so sorry  I grew older I did not realise how much I must have hurt you, every time I did something you were afraid I would do..I don’t want to mention as that list is long..As children we don’t understand that our parent's very essence of existence revolves around  us.. Something I would know only when I  have a child of my own.. It is so sad the older we grow, it becomes more and more difficult to tell someone how much you care, how much you love them, how far you can go to make them happy, how torn you are when you make them sad and how much you need them .. Sometimes I wish I were small again, I could simply just tell you dad that I am not going to talk to you because I am very angry.. :) (He still has a drawing that I made about 15 yrs ago which had a similar message ! ).I guess being an adult can be very frustrating.. You have so many problems , still you can’t  discuss everything with your dad, sometimes i just want to  cry in his arms.. and think that he would solve all my problems, erase all my pain. But now that I watch him I understand that he too has a lot on his mind and he can't...

For so many things you have sacrificed for my happiness, I love you so much... words fall short ...my eyes are wet as I type this..I don't want to  say thank you and make those  things sound petty. I know I would never be able to tell you this in real but no matter what, you are my perfect man. Though it is impossible but still I wish I get a man who can take care of me just the way you do  and no matter how long it takes whether I deserve such a guy or not I don’t care..because I have what I need most, mom and dad, the 2 most beautiful souls that actually believe in me ,I know you will always be by my side ,my strength and my motivation..and  love me for what I am and always be proud over me ! 

Every daughter is her father's princess..so am I !! :)


Shambhavi Priya ,III year .